In Which I Shine Like a Vampire

Corner of F and Collins. Where I wait, and wait, and wait for camera to see me.

If they don’t cast reflections, can vampires be photographed? And if a traffic camera does not see CR Biker, does that mean that very large man, wearing a bright vest, is really a vampire?

Maybe. There once were magnetic traffic controls at the corner of F Avenue NE and Collins Road, and back in the day, after the city deliberately boosted their sensitivity to serve the needs of bikers, I could put my bike crankshaft on the corner of the detector to trigger the traffic light.

Hey camera. I  am directly in front of you! Hellooooo!

These days, navigating the light has become trickier—it reminds me of the bad old day several years ago, when I had to “steal” the light from cars headed the opposite direction, or wait for a car going my way to activate the light.

A relatively new video traffic control system seems a bit dysfunctional. After all, if CR biker can’t activate it, one would think a person on a motorcycle might face similar problems. The light seems inconsistent—headed south to campus, I’ve been stuck several times. I had to wait through two light cycles this morning until a car going my way made the light change. The south-facing camera that sees me when I am going north, on the other hand, seems to work a bit more consistently.

Hello, camera looking north. I’m right here, right in front of you. And I promise I never suck blood. I faint at the sight of it. I’m about as far from a vampire as you can get …